I don’t know what happened. Completely tapped out, my season of incredible creativity turned. Suddenly, I have nothing left to give. Have you been there, got the t-shirt and later sold it at a yard sale? Many times I have found myself in this place. I usually recognize it when I finally have some free time and don’t know what to do. There is no promise of inspiration in these times. What to do now? Here’s my approach.

1. Be faithful – No matter what I do, I remind myself that I need to continue looking to God and following. Even when I am not inspired (or particularly inspiring), I can still be obedient in my call and work.

2. Do nothing – When I find myself here, it is often because I have been doing too much. I need some time to rest, think, remember, meditate, be indwelled, be enriched in the presence of Jesus. My best practice is to find a quiet spot of nature and let it speak to me. I’m not a spiritualist by any means, but I grew up surrounded by nature. It tells me things deep inside that I need to hear.

3. Confess – I always underestimate the power of confession. Sometimes the best thing I can do is just tell someone that I am feeling empty and alone. Never has this been fruitless.

4. Ask for help – I am a horrid example of this. Sometimes, I just need someone to encourage me, or confront me, or kick my butt. Honest friendship is a resource beyond most practices. It doesn’t wait for me to ask, but it is always beter when I do.

How do you defeat a dry spirit?

I had a crazy week meeting with my YMCP cohort. For some reason I just  couldn’t get focused. I was distracted and distracting. Often, I would get an idea and be so amped in my head that I couldn’t settle down enough to articulate it to the rest of the group. Knowing this only made it worse. I was beginning to become a bit paranoid about myself and my appearance. Then something cool happened.

Now friend and guerilla thinker, Jeff Goins, was talking to me about writing. Why do I think he is a guerilla thinker? He challenged me a lot this weekend probably without ever even knowing it. He is a soldier Drill Sergeant in the war on Christian mediocrity.

Hanging with Jeff, I started thinking about why I began writing in the first place. It wasn’t that I wanted to be famous for writing (if that’s my objective, I really need to rethink what I am doing). It all started with a curiosity about youth ministry. I wondered what youth ministry would be like if I got rid of some of the stereotypes. You know those right? Youth ministry should be fun, game oriented, attractional. It should make young adults do things like pray more, read their Bible more, attend church more, do less risky behavior, not drink or have sex. These are all good things, don’t get me wrong, but starting from that presupposition had limited my view of youth ministry and what it could do in the lives of teens. Worse, it limited what God could do through me.

So I started asking lots of questions of myself and others. I started trying new things that would counteract some of those old ways. Well, it wasn’t long before God started using this newfound freedom in me. It was more about who I was created to be, and curiosity was the vehicle for showing me that.

There has been a lot of thought about the future of youth ministry. I hope that curiosity drives that future.

Here are two videos about how wonder and curiosity should shape our vision of the future of youth ministry.

Lately, I have been meeting lots of new people and sharing a lot of my ideas. Mostly this has been through writing (that’s important later). Inevitably, I get to the point where someone begins to give me some feedback. Most of it has been really great, and I have been so encouraged by these experiences. Some of it has been not so encouraging. Through these experiences, I have had too many emotions to name. From disbelief, to feeling inadequate, to frustrated and angry, to relieved. It’s always hard for me to hear any pushback, because my ideas are my babies. They are what point to the deeper part of me that I can’t dismiss.

Here is what I am learning about how to take it:

1. Is it true?
This is the first thing I try to figure out. Is what is being said true? If so, I need to listen very closely. I need to be able to reflect on this criticism and look at myself as honestly as I can. I need to be able to make adjustments and corrections and make the most of this feedback to better myself.

If I decide that it isn’t true I need to move on.Responding may mean simply disagreeing.

If I find there was a misunderstanding I need to try to correct any distortion of the idea. It might mean that my expression of an idea was off and needs correcting. It might also mean that I was clear but they are just not getting it. In every case, I always want to respect the risk people take in criticism and continue the conversation.

2. Is it helpful?
Sometimes criticism is true, but there isn’t much help in it. If it’s not helpful, dismiss the applications of it, but remember to re-examine the idea in the future. For example, someone might not like the idea but respond with sarcasm that doesn’t make clear what they didn’t get or like. If I am being gracious, I can ask them to make their point more clear. I might also decide to let it end there, but then I won’t learn anything.

3. Is it personal?
This one is the hardest for me. Criticism is a snapshot response to one moment in time. This isn’t a declaration of our value, but is a perspective of one moment from one person’s pont of view. I need to be able to hear it and not take it personally.

Unless it is personal. Some people do criticize as a form for elevating their own self value. This is hard to recognize being on the receiving end of criticism. Sometimes when criticism sounds like a cutdown, it might just be. There isn’t much wisdom I have in responding to this, so most of the time I don’t. When I’m at my best, I leave those moments behind.

Any other wisdom in taking criticism?